What not to wear

Shortly after baby #3 was born I was feeling hard up for a pair of pants that actually fit and that were not maternity pants. To say that I was feeling a bit apprehensive about going out with all 3 children is an understatement. I was petrified! But I didn’t really have much choice, either. Plus the kids were going stir crazy being in the house so much and needed to get out. So, I ventured out.

First stop, Kohl’s. And as I was unloading children from the car I could smell that somebody needed a diaper change. So we made our first stop the bathroom. I changed the baby first….poopy. I changed Zoey second, also poopy. I changed Adam last, yes, also poopy. And yes, I had 3 children in diapers at one point. And no it wasn’t much fun.

This was in the early days when the baby still nursed every 2 hours or so. And even though I had fed the baby before leaving the house it had taken such a long time to load kids and load diaper bags and load strollers, and unload kids and diaper bags and strollers, not to mention the eternity we spent in the bathroom changing dirty diapers, that now it was time to feed the baby again. So we find ourselves a nice large corner dressing room where I try (without much success) to keep the 3 year old and the 18 month old occupied while I feed the baby. But try as I might I couldn’t keep them from crawling underneath the dressing room stalls. Or from licking the mirror.

But finally I am done feeding the baby and I think I’m going to finally get to do a little shopping. But the baby was still also in the stage that he poops after every feeding. And apparently Zoey wasn’t quite done with her business when I changed her the first time because she is poopy again as well. So after ANOTHER trip to the bathroom I’m done!!! D-O-N-E! After leaving the bathroom for the second time we head straight for the car. Without passing GO and without collecting $200. And without a pair of pants that fit. Which is really the reason new moms don’t go anywhere the first several months after having a baby…we have nothing to wear!